White Again

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“Mama, can you go back in the machine and turn white again?”

And so began the questions about why she looks different from the rest of our ‘lil family (at least temporarily). I’ll admit, I had just come out of a spray tan machine, preparing my skin for so I don’t look like I’ve spent years inside (even though that’s true, too). This temporary change had my ‘lil girl in a fluster.

She continued, “You need to turn white again because now you look like Bubby and Daddy and I am alone. If you won’t go in the machine and turn white, can I go in and turn brown, too? Did Daddy and Bubby get brown from the machine?”

Admittedly, we are not prepared for the questions that are sure to come. She looks different from her brother, and is starting to realize it. This will be a minor, temporary questioning phase as I am sure to go back to being Twilight-white with her soon, but it still pains me to know my ‘lil girl is confused by the color of her skin. The day will come, however, when she wants to, needs to know why she looks different from ‘lil Man, but this is not the time. She may never fully understand her story, but three is not the age to begin to explain it. The day will come.

For now, I’ll continue to field questions from her about why I am brown for a little while and keep reassuring her that white is alright, too. At least she still loves me, even if I turned a ‘lil brown.

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This is probably one of my favorite shots with her, she’s too fun!

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