Something I Cannot Do

There are many things I’ve said I cannot do, like run a Half Marathon. There are few things I say I cannot do and truly cannot do. And this post is about to bring to light one of those things.

I’m embarrassed. As a mother, a semi-foodie, a Technical Support Analyst. This one is silly, but it’s true.

People, I cannot use a manual can opener.

I swear to you, I have tried. I’ve been shown a hundred times. I’ve broke down and asked others to open cans for me several times at work. It’s something I just cannot do. And it’s embarrassing. Every time I try to open a can of green beans at work, it ends up a mess and I am sure people notice and are laughing. (Yes, I eat a whole can of green beans. Have you seen my progress? Okay then, hush.) But really, my brain cannot use a manual can opener.

Before writing this post, I checked out this Wiki How page about how to do it, but it still boggles my mind. I have not a clue. (And PS, what in the world is that old fashioned one?!?!? If ever presented with one, I will give up my quest to eat green beans for that meal—the calories consumed would be negative compared to calories exerted to open the can.)

Some of you may remember my really crappy electric can opener from my years in Myrtle. Although it sometimes fell apart and I was really the only person who could use it, I rocked that beast. (And it cost $5 and lasted me about 5 years until Greg finally said it was junk and time to buy a $10 one with a knife sharpener.) Now I am wishing I’d kept that thing and had it at my desk.

You laugh, but it’s true. Opening a can with a manual can opener is something I simply cannot do.

(Image Source: Wikipedia)

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