The Ultimate Soccer Mom Guide

Today’s post comes from Elizabeth of Try it and You May!, and is part of a special day of shenanigans from other Pittsburgh Bloggers. You can see my post over on Orange Chair Blog, where I give my thoughts from my Orange Chair.

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Elizabeth’s thoughts are right in line with what’s ahead of me…life as a soccer mom! Arianna and Evan start next week, so I asked for advice. Thanks, Elizabeth!

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Being a “soccer mom” used to be considered an insult by many. Thanks to the success of U.S. Women’s National Team, being a Soccer Mom is now the coolest thing around. Sadly, there are some moms out there who are still nervous about assuming their rightful place on the sidelines and on the pitch because they didn’t know the game. I know how those moms feel. I used to be one of them.

I am a Soccer Mom and I love it. Being the Ultimate Soccer Mom isn’t just about cheering from the sidelines, it’s about learning to love the Beautiful Game. I love watching it live and on TV. I love playing it in my backyard with my kids. I love following hottie soccer guys and gals on social media. So if your goal is to be the Ultimate Soccer Mom, here are ten tips to help you get started. With a little soccerifice, you, too, can be an Ultimate Soccer Mom.
1. Dress appropriately. Get yourself some sweet soccer kicks and a fab jersey. I recommend one from the U.S. Women’s National Team, but there are some excellent choices out there.

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2. Get some skills. Practice your toe taps, your shakers, your juggling. Learn how to nutmeg (that means kicking the ball between your opponent’s feet). Nutmeg your kids often and shout “Nutmeg!” Do it in flip-flops against your competitive older son for extra points.

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3. Learn the offsides rule. This is a tricky one for non-soccer-players (also known as Soccer Muggles). It’s not that hard. The offense can’t pass the ball to a player who is past the last defender. Once you’ve got it, realize it’s never called in little kid’s games but feel free to mention it casually like, “Great game honey, don’t worry, that last goal by the other team was offsides anyway.”

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4. Develop a signature celebration. This is an essential part of your training. As you play with your kids and develop your ball handling skills (Have you nutmegged your child today?), you need to be prepared to celebrate when you score a goal. You should not jump up and down and cheer. You could work on a variation of the airplane swoop, or maybe the jazz hands shake, or leap into your teammate’s arms (if they can catch you), or even imitate Ronaldo’s matador-style “leap and shout” move. Make it memorable.

 

5. Always have money for the snack bar and be prepared for rain. They still play in the rain. This isn’t baseball.

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6. Make sure you and your kids know Messi and Wambach, Ronaldo and Lloyd. This sport turns men and women athletes into legends.

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7. Be patient while they select the perfect pair of cleats or “boots.”

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8. Don’t let your kid be a diver (someone who fakes injuries). Sure, they might get hurt. Your five year old might even get kicked in the face by their mom on Mother’s Day. But hey, they said they wanted to be goalie! And it’s important not to perpetuate those “kick like a girl” stereotypes!!

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9. Take them to a Pittsburgh Riverhounds game. Serious family fun and up-close action.

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10. Be your soccer playing kid’s biggest fan. Don’t worry about whether they are good or not. Just make sure they are having fun and that you are out there having fun with them.

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Bonus Tip #11: Face Paint and Faux-hawks are Ultimate.

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Check out the other bloggers involved in today’s event!

Harvest + Bloom // Yes, Wear That! // jelly jars // Glam and Graffiti // To The Streets // In Pursuit // Pittsburgh & Pearls // Beezus Kiddo // Goodness Madness // Last Minute Panic // Steel City Intrigue // Crank Crank Revolution // Amanda Narcisi // Pittsburgh is Beautiful // From Cats to Cooking // Yum Yum PGH // Breelicious Bites // Parmesan Princess // Coffee & A Blonde // The Steel Trap // Wavy Alabaster // everybody loves you… // Eat with Emily // Don’t Forget to Eat // Sloping in the Sky // From Farm to Turntable // Secrets in the Wall // Red Pen Mama // Feedback Soup // The AP Collection // Blog Or Die PGH // Pittsburgh Happy Hour // Friendly Fitness Foodie // Small Town Dad // Josh’s World // Geeky Sweetie // Sean’s Ramblings // Lunges, Long Runs and Lattes // Try it and You May! // lil Burghers // Orange Chair Blog // Ya Jagoff // Pittsburgh Lesbian Correspondents // Melissa Firman

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