It’s early compared to my desired sleep schedule. It’s late compared to my running/training/beast mode sleep schedule. But 6 AM really isn’t that bad, is it?
Well, any way you look at it, I am awake. At almost 17 weeks into this pregnancy, I have hit the “wake up by 4 AM and not fall back to sleep until your alarm is 20 minutes from bleeping” portion of the preggo sleep problem and it is wearing me down!
You see, it’s not just that I can’t fall back to sleep. I get up to pee and then want a drink which leads to wanting (what I have phrased) first breakfast which leads to Facebook browsing which leads to thinking of my to do list. If you give a preggers a cookie…
And, can we talk about the fact that pairing my inability to sleep with my asthma, an apple sized (I’ve lost track, probably bigger with the giant babies tall genes from Greg’s family and my uncles and brother’s side of mine) baby tucked up in a rib already, and a 2 week cold that just won’t become a cold is not fun. Vapor Rub and I have a love hate thing. My inhaler thinks I am in training again. And sleeping for more than 10 seconds on my right side? Forget it. Sorry, baby A and left arm. You will probably continue to be nestled in my pregnancy wedge for 5 more months. 2 down, 5 to go. Yup, got a relief for the 1st month of knowing I was pregnant and actually was able to sleep. A lot. Thanks for those days, body.
And now? The sun is coming up. All of my lovies and snoozing tight, sweet little breaths and the occasional snore from the big one. Even the babies feel nestled in and comfy. But not mama.
I may have months to go and cannot sleep, but yes, I will go with what people keep telling me. It’s worth it. The lack of sleep, the gaining of a belly (and buying of new pants), the acid I spew from my mouth even in week 16, the numbness in my hip, and the want to eat all the pizza and ice cream but telling myself back away. It’s worth it.
Both of my babies have already taught me that. Arianna, especially. I went through a lot with her emotionally (and still do, to be honest); but watching her READ (she’s reading!), write (definitely has had MOM down pat for a few years, gold stars for that), and draw (we have an artist on our hands) make me so proud and so glad she’s ours. And Evan. When he grabs my hand with his baby soft palms and asks me to “come see” his block buildings or draws me scribbles of the babies in my tummy or snuggles up after a nap, I know how much he loves being ours. And the best part? We get to watch in awe and wonder as two more bring us up as parents. It will be awesome.
And totally worth the fact that I am going to rest my eyes for another 35 minutes before a fun filled work day and rainy trick-or-treat. I got this. Because they got me.
And totally worth this throwback to Arianna’s first Halloween (6 years ago).